9 Years Ago Today....

...I was sitting on my stoop, relaxing and drinking coffee as Houdini played in the yard. It was peaceful--the neighborhood was in weekday-quiet mode and rush hour on route 1 was beginning to slow. I lingered under that perfect blue sky, not yet knowing that September 11, 2001 had irrevocably become "9/11."

Much has and will continue to be written about that day. I won't pretend to have any particularly profound observations to make. But today, nine years later, these are my thoughts:


It's another clear blue day--pleasant but no match for that cerulean blue I can still see in my mind's eye. (I'm sure that the character of that sky--it's shade and brilliance--has been embellished in my mind by time, but that's how I remember it.) I am again on the stoop, drinking coffee. But where is the peace? All is noise. Yard tools are wielded. Traffic whizzes by, drivers on their way to...?

When does a woman become a cougar?

40? 39? And do you get extra "cougar free" years if you get carded?

Those are the questions I pose in my current Facebook headline. It's mostly a sardonic observation, but it probably won't surprise you to learn that I turned 39 on Saturday.

I've never really dated younger men. Not sure I'm going to. But evidently "cougar" now means any single woman above the age of 40 (age taken from internet "research").

OK. So let me get this straight.

My early 30s were all about the stereotypical baby clock. But evidently my late 30s were supposed to be about the cougar clock.

I'll synchronize my special "cougar" watch. Goodness, I'm awfully behind in my preparation. Good thing I have helpful information like the tip below, taken from an article on msnbc called "5 tips to being a sexy cougar."

Thanks MSNBC! I'm so relieved to hear that it's OK to be a cougar just as long as I maintain a preternaturally young appearance.

clipped from www.msnbc.msn.com Age is just a number. That’s the most important thing. These women are redefining what aging looks like. Because they eat well, exercise and do everything necessary to maintain a healthy balance in their life, 40, 50 or 60 never looked so good.

Die, rodent, die!

You know your life is seriously out of balance when you keep having to interrupt your work freak out/my-therapist-has-been-out-of-town-for-weeks call to your father in order to yell, "shit!" "get away!" and "goddamn mice!" at a particularly bold rodent headed for your dog's water bowl.

All of this while you're waiting for the valium to kick in.

Our Daughters, Ourselves

Onslaught.

It's an award-winning short film from Dove's Campaign for Real Beauty. The tagline: Talk to your daughter before the beauty industry does.

I don't have a daughter. But I do have a niece. And more painfully, I have a mirror.

I don't like what I see in it.

Which is ridiculous. I am not hideous, deformed or even just plain ugly. But sometimes I think I am. In the mirror, on the scale, trying on clothes, just walking around. That little voice in my head: You're fat. You're getting old. Is that a wrinkle? A new gray hair? Is my neck starting to sag? My eyelids droop?

I'm 38 years old and in pretty good health and shape for my age. I could stand to lose a few pounds--for my health--but I'm certainly not falling to pieces like some decrepit old house.

And what if I were? Is it no longer possible to approach 40 without Botox and a plastic surgeon on speed dial? Is youth our only currency?

These are not just the narcisstic ramblings of one neurotic type A personality, but thoughts that most women I know share. After all, we're all subjected to this barrage every day.

The film is a 60-second, turbo-charged distillation of everything advertising and the beauty industry have to throw at us.

Very cleverly done. It captures our crazy-making beauty culture perfectly. There's even a split second image of a woman kneeling before a toilet, presumably on the verge of purging.

Read Advertising Age's review of the ad--including appropriate calling out of Unilever for also producing Axe body spray and Slim Fast.

Things I won't do for the sake of the environment

Yes, it's spring, and I've finally crawled out from hibernation to add a new post to my "new" blog.

The number one emailed article at the New York Times today is about a couple and their small child going to eco-extremes in a year-long experiment in living green. To wit: they will not buy any food that hasn't been grown within a 250-mile radius of NYC and they will not buy anything besides that food. They will also not use any carbon-fuelled transportation (elevators included) or produce any trash (they are composting IN their apartment). Among the food items that are banished (or will be once they run out): olive oil, balsamic vinegar and spices! They dine by the light of candles and one fluorescent bulb. And scooter or walk to work and everywhere else.

I admire their commitment (and of others who are doing similar things), I do. I've been singing the praises of the environmentally-enlightened (and rightful U.S President) Al Gore since 1992. I am honestly seriously concerned about global warming, and as anyone who knows me will tell you, I consider "skeptics" to be the equivalent of people who still believe the earth is flat.

But it's hard to walk the talk.